6 days to the 2016
Dear Manay,
I'm about to start working on the sixth day but alas, I am distracted with this thing called plopping down my thoughts a.k.a. blogging. And so i waste away a few minutes of my time with a little flashback.
On the 4th day of the year, after seeing so many shrunk 'essays' on facebook about life and starting new, being fresh and all that jazz, i receive a text from my headwriter with a nice customary happy new year greeting and a meeting sked for revisions of my script. Revisions? Whut? I felt my self esteem shackle there for a moment-- hindi pa rin nila gusto ang ginawa ko? Bakit? Huhuhu. Oo. yun talaga ang naisip ko, kasama ang huhuhu.
I had to prepare myself mentally for major revisions, aside from that, i had to cuddle myself into thinking that a revision is just a revision--- it does not define you. It could be a moment of dramatic walling but it's not the end of the world. It's there because you missed something and it is meant to improve and make better. You just have to do it. Tralalalala.
Good thing, it wasn't my fault kaya medyo naka-luwag ako ng dibdib. Pero my goodness, how it rewired my high up there new year moment to a mid-slump. Sarili talaga minsan ang kaaway natin. Ang ating ego. At kung kasalanan ko nga iyon, kailangan ko pa ring i-own up iyon. I have to work on this really.
So I'm here on the 6th day, back aching, puson protruding and fingers tapping. No new years resolution as always. Come what may lang, manay. Wala din akong bucket list eversince buckets and lists became the norm. I don't have a vision board or life theme for the year. So anong ganap ko? Wala, scram lang ng scram. Kung anong ma-feel ng kalamnan kong gawin, at kung may dumating na thought provoking, i just allow myself to be provoked, and then adjust and go lang.
Last year kasi was a bit of a slump. Nagkasakit ang anak ko, leukemia. And from there, perspectives came lining up on it's own. Things seemed easy for me because I want it to be that way. May solution naman at iyon ang naging hold ko. The problems are there, the wants, the needs but the solution, the way to get it done is so much more than the difficulty that came. Kaya siguro, keri lang.
Aside from the apple cider vinegar benefits, ito ata ang nadiscover ko at natutunan ko last year na ngayon ko lang napagtanto; to focus on the solution or the means to do it (whether the goal is magpapayat, mag-ipon etc) because it will present itself if you see it from that light. Ah, i love looking back and realizing how i handled stuff without even me knowing it. So here's to surprising myself again this year and doing things the soul and body aches to do.
PS> I love the aching to do things in life. May kasamang discomfort or kati na kailangang lagpasan para makuha yung kagustuhan. Things are way better when we go painfully for it no? Masokista lang.
I'm about to start working on the sixth day but alas, I am distracted with this thing called plopping down my thoughts a.k.a. blogging. And so i waste away a few minutes of my time with a little flashback.
On the 4th day of the year, after seeing so many shrunk 'essays' on facebook about life and starting new, being fresh and all that jazz, i receive a text from my headwriter with a nice customary happy new year greeting and a meeting sked for revisions of my script. Revisions? Whut? I felt my self esteem shackle there for a moment-- hindi pa rin nila gusto ang ginawa ko? Bakit? Huhuhu. Oo. yun talaga ang naisip ko, kasama ang huhuhu.
I had to prepare myself mentally for major revisions, aside from that, i had to cuddle myself into thinking that a revision is just a revision--- it does not define you. It could be a moment of dramatic walling but it's not the end of the world. It's there because you missed something and it is meant to improve and make better. You just have to do it. Tralalalala.
Good thing, it wasn't my fault kaya medyo naka-luwag ako ng dibdib. Pero my goodness, how it rewired my high up there new year moment to a mid-slump. Sarili talaga minsan ang kaaway natin. Ang ating ego. At kung kasalanan ko nga iyon, kailangan ko pa ring i-own up iyon. I have to work on this really.
So I'm here on the 6th day, back aching, puson protruding and fingers tapping. No new years resolution as always. Come what may lang, manay. Wala din akong bucket list eversince buckets and lists became the norm. I don't have a vision board or life theme for the year. So anong ganap ko? Wala, scram lang ng scram. Kung anong ma-feel ng kalamnan kong gawin, at kung may dumating na thought provoking, i just allow myself to be provoked, and then adjust and go lang.
Last year kasi was a bit of a slump. Nagkasakit ang anak ko, leukemia. And from there, perspectives came lining up on it's own. Things seemed easy for me because I want it to be that way. May solution naman at iyon ang naging hold ko. The problems are there, the wants, the needs but the solution, the way to get it done is so much more than the difficulty that came. Kaya siguro, keri lang.
Aside from the apple cider vinegar benefits, ito ata ang nadiscover ko at natutunan ko last year na ngayon ko lang napagtanto; to focus on the solution or the means to do it (whether the goal is magpapayat, mag-ipon etc) because it will present itself if you see it from that light. Ah, i love looking back and realizing how i handled stuff without even me knowing it. So here's to surprising myself again this year and doing things the soul and body aches to do.
PS> I love the aching to do things in life. May kasamang discomfort or kati na kailangang lagpasan para makuha yung kagustuhan. Things are way better when we go painfully for it no? Masokista lang.
Comments
Post a Comment