Q Diaries #3

Hello! How are you again?  It's a few days before this  dreaded year will end but who knows what 2021 will bring. Will it be better? Or will it be the year that will break the camel's back.

 

For whatever it brings, it will surely have lessons along the way.  But let me reflect a bit this 2020--- what did I really do? In all honesty and coming from a point of privilege, I have coped up well. I welcomed the uncertain months of no work-no pay because of no tapings/shootings in the TV industry where I am part of.  I have replaced it with more time for myself by exercising and doing nothing--- a luxury I couldn't afford during the normal days.  It's ironic I couldn't have time for myself when I had continuous money but when the cash flow is threatened, it just felt... good. I had time. I should be worried as most people have felt but it didn't happen even as I stare at my depleting bank account. Is this my mind rebelling  from the already rebellious norm, an anxiety in the form of denial or am I just a secret prick on emergency fund? I could be all of those but I guess, I owe this to the Daily Stoic, exercise, sex? and mostly this great sense of faith that the Universe will never let me down.  She will put me in a no rest mode to rack up some dough for the family which is what I got by December.  

I am on a roll and as busy at the tail end of the year so here I am romanticizing my lazy days.  A "doing nothing" activity of mine during the past few months is documenting my going out outfits. I have time so some self absorption is imminent. Dressing up is something I do to feel good (like most of us do).  Here are some stuff I wore on my grocery days.  

The above the knee collection but mostly grab and go since I am always in a hurry to leave the house.

This is one of my favorites since it feels refreshingly dated.  I bought this ten years ago. It didn't fit after a few years and I gave it to M but lo and behold, I am wearing it again! 

Up next is the midi/ long dress collection or when I feel I want to shock the grocery staff. Or put some sass and twirl in the meat section.

a gust of wind for some flowy vogue

this was a conversation starter. felt cute here

 my basic housedress that can turn into a grocery run dress/ no i don't wear a hat at home, just a prop for the pose

 

I'm really into dresses since they're so easy to wear, light and feels kinda dressy with minimal effort. Of course, I have a few pants/shorts but I make 'em flowy and green.

 

Aside from posing for my OOTD, I have surpisingly met new friends and dropped an old one. Yes, another one chose to bite the dust from my atmosphere but the situation is different. I really wish her well.  I'm just too old for people projecting their unhealed issues to me and making me look bad for what they believe I did. I' m nearing 40, so if you must go, then go. But still I am thankful for heightened video calls with friends who chose to keep me close. See, I am not that bad just like what this year has been. It's a matter of perspective. We choose and we live by it with the hope that things will be better. Cheers to you whoever reads this. I celebrate you and all the things you felt this year, good and bad.